by Vikki Anderson
The issue with doing my spiritual work is that you try very hard to help those in need. The people who won’t face reality, who live in a world of their own and who get so angry when you try to bring them back to reality, that it is scary. Some of them need anger management classes and others just need reliable therapy.
This happened to me so I thought I’d share my experience. I had a lovely tarot student who is my daughter’s age of 26. She was very pretty, had a great personality (although very shy, no confidence nor self esteem) and was extremely overweight for her age. She is in love with, let’s call him Micheal. Michael sounds like a good guy although a Virgo (pardon me, everyone, but I do have some issues with Virgos! LOL) and she’s a Libran. Librans are the suckers of the zodiac. They hate confrontation, but when you put their backs up against the wall, they are the sign of open warfare — thus, I did get her wrath when I was trying to let her see reality in this relationship.
Sometimes, a reader gets close to a client, like I did with this one because she was so helpless and clueless about life. My daughter is extremely the opposite, so I thought that maybe I could help her come back to live in the third dimensional world that we were all born into; however, it back fired on me.
Here, let’s call her Jane, loves this man Michael. They’ve been going out for two years and he hasn’t proposed, hasn’t suggested moving in together or any other type of commitment. She had been a regular tarot client and then a tarot student. She was not that adept to tarot, but she was coming along slowly but surely — her insecurity and lack of belief in herself made her doubt her readings. Jane had two more lessons to go to be certified as a beginner in the Totally Tarot Method.
Jane went on a cruise with Michael and she said they had a great time. I was so happy for her. She had hoped that he was going to propose on the cruise, but he did not. In fact, he always uses work as an excuse and is not around as much as a boyfriend, especially one in a committed relationship, should be. He also was looking for a two family house (coincidentally, he cannot find one that satisfies him….hmmm…) for them to live in someday with his mother living up or downstairs. Sounds like a great future already, doesn’t it?
So, I emailed her and asked how the cruise was and if she was engaged. I knew she wasn’t or she would have emailed me, but there was always hope. (PS: I did a tarot card spread and know he will not marry her, but that’s another story). She had also told me that she would like his children whether or not they were married and I tried to tell her that even though she had children with this man, it did not mean that they would be together forever. I wanted her to think logically, something this woman seems to have a problem with.
Then Jane told me she was having nightmares because of the tarot and I suggested that if she were (which is most unlikely) that she should look at the cards or symbols coming out in her dreams as they might be a message for her to use or act upon. I told her that I thought it was all subconscious stuff that was finally surfacing about the lack of commitment in her relationship and the chaos it caused, but my words were not heard. She heard what she wanted to hear…fantasy, illusion and delusion. Anyway, I also informed her that I would be moving in with my boyfriend in October after knowing each other for 8 months and she went ballistic on me. Could it be that she realized that being with this loser for 2 years without a commitment was a reality gone wrong? Perhaps.
She told me to mind my own business and to never contact her again. She told me that I was manipulative and that Michael and she were happy and fine and he was committed to her. I wrote her back that I just wanted her to live in reality and that I wished her well for her future.
Reactions like these are common in people who need lots of psychological help in dealing with reality. I thought I was kind enough throughout our many weeks of individual classes together to give her clues about her ill fated relationship and to make her understand that she should not wait forever for this man. I know, she will wait 50 years for him even though he brings nothing to her life.
She is in therapy and I hope it continues. I feel sorry to say that I felt like I lost a daughter, but in reality, I have only one daughter and I love her very much. I try very hard not to get involved in my clients or students’ lives, but sometimes you just feel that you are needed and you do what you can to help. Sometimes, like this particular instance, it backfires.
Unfortunately for both of us – we have gone our separate ways and I sometimes wonder if I should have just left her living in a reality where everything is sunshine and roses and negativity doesn’t exist. For some people, this is where they spend a lot of their time rather than dealing with life as it happens and coping with decisions and consequences about their own futures.
To Jane, I say, I wish you the best and hope that you do marry Michael one day. I hope it is also in a time frame when you can have the children you desire so much.
Copyright 2009 by Vikki Anderson and http://www.vikkianderson.net. No part of this article can be used without mentioning the author’s name or website.